Tattoos can be beautiful things – a subtle piece of self expression etched on to your body for life. They can be artful and meaningful. However these guys have taken the idea of the horrifically bad, cringe worthy tattoo to an entire different level. There are misspellings, misguided ideas and just the downright bizarre in this selection of some of the most awful tattoos of all time.
1. The Middle-Aged Tattooed Twilight Fan
There is only one justifiable reason to be a huge Twilight fan, and that’s that you’re a 13-year-old girl. The rest of us may appreciate it for what it is and have a grudging respect for it as a populist teen fantasy, but that’s not being a fan. It certainly isn’t being a big enough fan to get Edward and Bella tattooed on your back. Thankfully most of those who’d even consider this aren’t old enough to go into tattoo parlours, however this middle-aged woman decided that what would really make her look incredibly cool was Edward Cullen’s eyes staring out from beneath the Twilight logo. It’s enough to make you wish you didn’t have to go out in sunlight.
Image source: Buzzfeed.com
2. The Devil Makes Work For ‘Idel’ Hands
The old saying states that the devil makes word for idle hands, but in this case he, or rather his tattoo artist associate has made work on idle hands. Except if only they were idle hands, because the devil’s tattooist apparently cannot spell a four letter word. Seriously? As will see throughout this selection, bad spelling of tattoos appears to be a pretty regular occurrence. Surely when you’re taking your tattoo exams someone asks you whether a) you can spell simple words and b) if this isn’t exactly your bag you have the wit to spend one minute checking the spelling on the internet.
Image source: failblog.com
3. This Tattoo Being The Worst
Clearly this man has made some bad decisions, although we hate to think what the worst of them were before this particular decision, as he’d have had to have decided that he’d made some bad decisions before making the absolutely terrible one to get this fact tattooed on his back. Here’s a tip for wannabe skin scribes – irony or jokes aren’t a good idea in tattoos for one simple and obvious reason. When a joke, sarcastic pun or witty remark is told once it’s quite funny. However when it’s told repeatedly over a hundred times it’s grating, annoying and makes the teller look a fool. Tattoos are permanent so this is what you are effectively doing. The first time this guy’s mates see this they may think it funny. The fortieth? They’ll be laughing at, not with him.
Image source: freepblog.wordpress.com
4. The Artist At Work
Being a tattoo artist is quite a skilled job – even the simplest designs require a patience and sureness of hand that most of us lack. This guy appears to have picked the wrong guy when aiming to adorn his body with a winged horse. The result instead looks like a cross between Puff the Magic Dragon and Cyril Sneer from The Raccoons. Here’s a tip – if you haven’t used a specific tattoo artist before, it’s probably best to get him to ink you somewhere you can see it first.
Imagesource: failblog.com
5. No, We Can, and We Will…As An Idiot
Judge Judy is effectively Jeremy Kyle in a gown. Perfectly acceptable television if you need to kill hours watching day time TV but not to get a tattoo of. This is especially because it was a show that tended to disappoint – the title ‘Judge Judy’ in the mind implied that Judy Sheindlin would be passing judgement on miscreants, putting away criminals and dispensing sweet justice. Instead the cases always seemed to involve a couple who had fallen out over whether to watch Grid Iron or American Idol and were now debating the custody of the widescreen TV. Honestly, it is literally like a Brit getting a tattoo of Jeremy Kyle, and that is something which is just incredibly creepy.
Image source: xd.xanga.web
6. No Regerts, But Plenty Of Regrets
Robbie Williams once sung “No regrets, they don’t work, No regrets, they only hurt.” Well this is one case where having no regrets did hurt, and in fact probably caused more regrets as a misspelling caused this individual to be lacking in ‘regerts’ rather than the regrets he intended. Of course this could be a wonderful piece of ironic tattoo artistry, but as earlier stated, it doesn’t pay to try and be too ironic or clever with a tattoo so we’re putting this one down to terrible spelling once more.
Image source: runt-of-the-web.com
7. Nickelback, On Your Skin Forever
There are many bands or artists whose lyrics one could get tattooed on your skin. Bob Dylan, The Beatles, if you’re a bit morose about life Morrissey and The Smiths. Going back further there’s a wealth of poets from Byron to Tennyson whose verse you could choose to etch into your arm. Instead this person chose everyone’s least favourite Canadian noise pollution and all round irritant, Nickelback. What does this even mean? If you want to buy something you should be prepared to brawl for it? It’s a novel idea, but it would mean an awful lot of riots in Poundland.
Image source: runt-of-the-web.com
8. Mr Cool Ice
What was Mr Cool Ice thinking when he decided to get ‘Mr Cool Ice’ and a skull and crossbones tattooed on his torso and arms. Was it that he wished he’d been born to parents with a normal surname but would show defiance? Was he preparing for a future career as a pirate themed ice cream man? Sadly we can only speculate. What do know is that this tattoo is up there with the most truly awful body art of all time. Well done Mr Cool Ice, now where’s my Calippo?
Image source: runt-of-the-web.com
9. Vegetables Never Do Know
Tomorrow Never Knows is one of The Beatles more famous tunes, with its psychedelic feel and lyrics inspiring generations of songwriters. This person however appears to have got their love of the Fab Four mixed up with their groceries list, as they’ve written ‘To Marrow Never Knows’. To be fair, vegetables aren’t known as great thinkers, so they’re technically correct – marrows do never know. But again this seems one to put down to careless spelling – this time of a word we use every day. Will this person use it tomorrow? Well you never know.
Image source: imgkid.com
10. Manchester City 2011 Champions League Winners
There’s a special place reserved on this list for the idiotic football tattoo – the fan who not realising the transient nature of the modern game gets a huge tattoo of his team’s current striker only to see them wander down the road to their rivals for example. The worst though is a peculiar modern vogue for attention seeking fans to get tattoos commemorating their team’s victory before it’s actually happened. Upon his club being taken over by Arab billionaires, this Manchester City fan decided to have ‘2011’ Champions League Winners’ tattooed on his arm. Predictably, they were nowhere near. Of course one could point out that he could easily get the last ‘1’ changed when they do win the competition – except he’s still waiting for City to win and they appear no nearer doing so.
Image source: MEN.co.uk
We’re not sure if they were drunk when they got their tattoos or the artist may be to blame. Here’s a list of failed tattoos that you’ll laugh and cringe at all at the same time. LOL
11. “It’s get better”
We hope it does. Good luck!
Image source: scoopis.com
12. Hey Beautiful!
Eyebrow’s on fleek! keep slayin’ gurl!
Image source: tattoodo.com
13. Passport Tattoo
Maybe he can show this when he forgets his passport.
Image source: buzzfeed.com
14. Hairline problem?
Experiencing hair loss? This might just work! NOT.
Image source: wordpress.com
15. Mutant Ninja Turtle
He might just be able to use this to get the ladies. What do you think?
Image source: answcdn.com
16. “This is where I poo!”
In case she forget, she had it tattooed on her butt as a reminder.
Image source: pinimg.com
17. Portait
I’d be furious with the artist if he did a portrait of the child this bad.
Image source: justsomething.co
18. “Too Cool for Scool”
A result of not going to school – spelling problem.
Image source: pinimg.com
